Friday, January 13, 2012

Dear Readers:
At times you may wonder how people withstand what they are going through in life. Seeing others experience suffering causes you to reflect on how blessed your life may really be. Many people are "in pain" emotionally, mentally, socially, spiritually, and/or physically and manage not to show it. In remembering this fact, the saying: "There but for the grace of God go I," is a good way to bring it all into perspective. At times, my plate is full of concerns and issues that I deal with in life, and at other times I am not as busy or preoccupied. When I have a moment to reflect on what someone else may be experiencing, I find that I become more compassionate as I relate to where they are coming from in life. Walking a mile in someone else's shoes truly does enable you to become more caring and understanding.
One of my goals this year is not to jump to conclusions or pre-judge anyone. If I feel like not talking to someone or not listening to someone's problems, I try to remind myself that I may be in similar circumstances myself in the future. Then, how would I feel if no one listened or even tried to understand what I was telling them? I would feel neglected and marginalized at best. At the worst, I would feel discounted or not worthy of their personal attention - in a word, dehumanized.
It is important to treat everyone with respect. If we model that behavior it will come back around to serve us. As you give respect you will receive it. Many perfectly capable people request special considerations because they feel that they have "earned" those privileges. In reality, they have not but are just asking for more because they can. Others who are truly in need soldier through and never request assistance. Entitlement is not an active word in their vocabulary.
I admire people who cause you to take a second look because of something they have not done. For example, 1) They do not request an exemption to the rules. 2) They do not look for pity. 3) They focus on others rather than themselves. 4) They give before they get. 5) They refrain from complaining. 6) They press on even when not feeling 100%. 7) They seldom talk about themselves, but rather ask you how you are doing. 8) They also inquire about persons significant to you. 9) They model positive behavior. And, 10) They acknowledge a Higher Power.
So, given the characteristics of those who walk the talk, isn't it time you ask yourself if you are on the pain free program? Take the above ten step prescription and check your results in a week!

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